Saturday, September 9, 2017

The Kindness of Strangers

Recently, it seems like I've been writing a gazillion posts about super-heavy and/or difficult things. And while I'm a huge proponent of letting yourself experience your emotions, and have been consciously trying not to shy away from emotionally challenging topics, there's been plenty of sunshine in my life, too!

Baby Girl is basically the bright center of the universe right now, with Jeff a close second. While the third trimester of pregnancy is not without its challenges (e.g. getting up from a sitting position, sitting back down again, zipping my dresses on my own, walking more than a few minutes without ligament pain under my giant belly, false contractions, and so on), I can't help but grin like a fool whenever I think about our growing family.

Since I started visibly showing, I've noticed something really lovely: people get super excited about babies! It feels like everywhere I go, people are wishing me well, or asking about the baby, or congratulating me. I think my personal favorite interaction was when Jeff and I went to the liquor store to buy a celebratory bottle of wine for him, and as I was carrying it out, one of the guys working there congratulated me on the baby. It was the classiest moment of my whole life. But I digress, slightly.

I realize that I've been lucky in my pregnancy-related interactions with others. I haven't had random strangers grabbing my belly, nor have I received much unsolicited parenting advice or childbirth horror stories. And only a few people have commented on how big the baby is going to be. This is good because those comments can feel a bit like a dig at how much weight I've gained, even if they're not intended that way at all.

It touches my heart so much to see all the kindness with which people react to my pregnancy. And I think this is because it reminds me of how much people have in common, and of the general goodwill that most people are capable of carrying for one another. Most people, I believe, can appreciate the untrammeled potential and hope that a baby represents; most people are gladdened by seeing someone else's joy.

Dress: vintage
Shoes: Gap
Belt: Doll Me Up
Bangles: Splendette
Earrings: Atomic Lucite

So while I've been thinking a lot about the worst tendencies that unhappiness brings out in some people, I need to keep reminding myself that most people aren't out to tear others to shreds. It's hard not to get hung up on unkind actions that go beyond the pale of acceptability, but those are the exception, not the norm, in my life. As my dad would say, I have to keep the upsetting, infuriating, and objectionable things that happen in perspective. And as I'm entering the home stretch of an uneventful pregnancy (at least in terms of our health), I've got to remember that I have many more blessings to count than I do afflictions, and (hopefully!) many more ahead.

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  1. I'm so glad people have been so positive about your pregnancy! I was so happy for you when I found out and I can't explain why, I'm just glad you have such happiness in your life because I honestly think you deserve so much happiness!

    x Envy
    Lost in Translation

  2. What a very upbeat post - and it goes so well with your wonderfully sunny dress. Mind you, even when you deal with serious topics, you usually cheer us all up with your dresses! Kx

  3. This was such a cute post to read, really left me smiling at how nice people can be!

    Jessica & James | /

  4. Hi, I love the summery dress and just fits so nicely with this happy post. It's nice to read that you are having a nice experience when dealing with others when relating to your pregnancy.

  5. This post was so cute! You look amazing as always Andi can't wait until we get to miss your little one 💖

  6. Such an uplifting and great post, also very true! I think sometimes we tend to think the worst of people but there's always someone who proves this assumption wrong and will brighten up your day. I'm so happy for you and that you're having such a great pregnancy, certainly glowing too, fits the ray of sunshine you are Emily! Just from reading your blog posts each week and interacting with you on twitter, I'm so glad you're part of this online community. Much love xx

  7. I adore how positive this post is, thanks for brightening my day with it! The tone and the dress are a perfect match - absolutely lovely :) And I'm soooo glad to hear strangers aren't assuming it's fine to touch you - such a pet peeve of mine - I get vicariously angry for friend's who've gone through it! Cheers to your home stretch and thanks so much for sharing your pregnancy journey with us!

    Mary Lane @NewYorkCliche

  8. What a lovely post! Its so nice that people have shown so much love. It really is what some of us need sometimes!

    Sarah | xx

  9. What a lovely post to read! It's so great that people have been so positive towards you. That dress looks lovely on you too, you look very happy in the photos :) xx

  10. This post is just ❤❤❤
    Cora ❤

  11. It's so nice to hear that people have been that kind to you :) I hope it will be the same when I'm there, or at least not have the horror stories, belly grabs or advice like you say ^^ x


  12. When I went through a rough time I had some online counselling and my counsellor advised me to get a new shiny diary, and wrote down one positive thing a day. She said how as humans we tend to remember and focus on negatives, and so having a diary to look back on only filled with positives is a boost. Even writing things down like when someone says you look nice, or tells you to have a nice day (or someone makes a nice comment on your blog!) and it really helped!
    P.S I absolutely love your dress!

  13. This dress is too cute on you! Love the bright colors in it. You look great! I'm so glad to hear that you've experiened so much kindness from strangers since becoming pregnant! That's refreshing to hear. :)

  14. Awh I'm so happy that you're getting good vibes all around! I always worry about how people react when they see that you're pregnant, and I'm glad that you haven't had any touchy-feely creeps (they are the worst). Can't wait to see the little one!

    Lizzie Bee // Hello Lizzie Bee